Addicted to the Familiar

Addicted to the Familiar

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I often use Constellations to look at personal energy that I cannot understand or whose answers lie within questions from the past, present, or future. This process is a helpful way to blindly look at things so that my logical mind and old patterned behaviors don't interfere with what my soul and subconscious want me to know or do. We all are personally connected to our life outcomes; the problems arise when we become entangled. In this situation, I was emotional and could not take myself out of it to review it objectively. I was all tied up!

The following Constellation results mystified me with wonder and excitement around their intelligent process.

First, I aligned my energy to neutralize it and pulled it behind me, setting the energy in myself and the space. The question I asked was an either A or B option. Question A was, "Do I actively stop this situation?" Question B was, "Do I allow the energy field to unfold this situation naturally?" I wrote question A on one piece of paper and B on another. I turned them upside down, shuffled them, and then placed them downward on the floor. (Yes, it is this easy!) I was drawn first toward A and stepped upon it. I noticed nothing as if I were in a calm white room, and then a wave of uncertainty came up through my system and left. Then, I was drawn to a picture of my mother's beautiful face, and cognitively, I didn't want her help. Then I went to option B. Immediately, I noticed ease and alignment in my system. I cognitively thought B must be "it" because I feel easy in it, but my sense drew me first to option A. Curiosity arose within me around this notion: why option B felt aligned yet wasn't my soul's #1 choice. Wow! This revealing information blew my mind! I only work from my centered Self; I discern everything from that point of alignment, so what did this mean? I stepped back to sit with this for a beat.

Before I flipped the blind papers over, I double-checked the results with another source, and sure enough, my soul wanted "A!" Why did my soul want the discomfort of option A when option B gave me peace and immediate alignment? After sleeping on this, I had an epiphany: Am I addicted to the familiar? My soul wants me to stop this situation. It wants me to take action to make the changes I want even though those changes will create chaos at first. Two days later, my process was validated when I realized what my mother represented in Option A: this unspoken message was about stepping into our lineage of fear and uncertainty. The uncertainty that waved through me during the findings of Option A was my opportunity to create systemic healing by calmly walking into it. The truth is, I have worked toward this change for some time. and this choice of momentary chaos is my rebirth!

Addictions can be the safe and familiar things that we embody easily and resort to with our behaviors and thoughts. They may also be avoiding uncomfortable discomfort in order to grow. Creating change and stepping into something new plays with the energy of risk and uncertainty. A big girls' game, no doubt! Especially now, at this time in our world. Except, I am skilled at jeopardy; in the past, I have leaped into choices without discerning the risk. I have thickened my skin without protecting my heart and ego. Part of my healing has been about opening all that shit up, so I met this polarized challenge to live my life focused on harmony, wanting peace and personal alignment, ease, and grace. So, even the thing that brought me growth has become obsolete. Think about that: the thing that brings you to your growth can become obsolete.

Now, in the perfect timing of Spring, I get to leap; I must, in fact, leap. I choose this path that brings uncertainty consciously. This time, I am NEW. I am a Seer, and I fully know myself and how this world functions through me. I have a plan that I have already been walking with well-tended magnification there.

It's time. Gratitude flows through me, knowing that how we say goodbye is just as crucial to who we are as our hellos ~ and that I am meeting this moment directly and easefully.

Please go to my website to UNDERSTAND MORE ABOUT CONSTELLATION WORK or book your own experience. In June 2025, join us for a free "Introduction to Family & Systems Constellations" in-person for local South Lake Tahoe and on Zoom for all other friends worldwide.